Reviews, Recipes, and Random Slices of Life

Of the new short story I just finished:

CLONING ENLIGHTENMENT
EXPERIMENT #9: ENLIGHTENMENT
CLONES ACROSS THE DISTANCE
CLONING ESTRANGEMENT
EXPERIMENT #9: ALIENATION OF AFFECTION
CLONING AFFECTION
EXPERIMENTING WITH ESTRANGEMENT
THE ESTRANGEMENT EXPERIMENT
NO PRACTICAL GIFTS: EXPERIMENT #10
THAT DISTANT GAZE
THAT TERRIBLE DISTANCE
THESE THINGS TAKE TIME
CLONING THE PERFECT COFFEE

I cannot come up with a good title to save my life. I swear. I need a title-generator that scans the text of the story and produces the perfect title.

Note: the story isn't a comedy, so whichever one I settle on shouldn't sound humorous (and most of them do).

Suggestions?